List of things that bother me:
1. When my extremities get very cold.
2. When people chew with their mouths open. SO ANNOYING.
3. When drivers are honk happy.
4. My bad posture when I sit in front of the computer.
5. Getting sick.
6. My half-broken cell phone.
7. When people sneeze or cough without covering up.
8. When my back starts hurting.
9. When I see other people getting left out.
10. When I get too shy to be nice to people...and end up being mean instead. SO STUPID I KNOW.
Just wanted to throw out an impromptu list before the day ended so I can write a new one tomorrow.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Post the Twenty-Fifth
2010 - A Year for Lists!!!!
I was chatting with Hudson about how he recently purchased three skinny Moleskine journals for $7. A sweet deal for pocket sanity if you'll ask me. I remember purchasing my first Moleskine last semester for the sake of preserving my sanity. Literally. And personally, I've found quite a bit of release and freedom in writing stuff down. Nevertheless, Hudson and I came upon the topic of lists. It sparked a ridiculous idea in my head to blog lists. Though I'm sure millions of people all over the world have blogged lists, I would still like to partake in this list-creating experience in 2010, and see where it leads me in the world of writing.
Without further delay, my first list of 2010: New Year's Resolutions List
1. Exercise 30 minutes a day no matter how busy I get. (Exceptions on sick days)
2. Read the Bible in a year.
-I'm not following a Bible-reading track, but I still feel I will finish the Bible this year because I plan on reading it every day.
3. Look to GOD as the source of my strength, wisdom, salvation, love, and encouragement. (A list within a list...I likey...)
4. Cut down on caffeine intake.
5. Sleep 8 hours a day.
6. Blog once a week.
7. Spend time outside, basking in God's creation for at least 15 minutes a week.
8. Cook once a week.
9. Work more on evangelizing to my non-Christian friends.
10. Pray more frequently and earnestly for God to sustain all areas of my life, relationships, studies, family, and future.
So a New Year's Resolution list isn't what one would prefer to call "creative", but I definitely think this list is necessary to a certain degree.
Happy New Year!
I was chatting with Hudson about how he recently purchased three skinny Moleskine journals for $7. A sweet deal for pocket sanity if you'll ask me. I remember purchasing my first Moleskine last semester for the sake of preserving my sanity. Literally. And personally, I've found quite a bit of release and freedom in writing stuff down. Nevertheless, Hudson and I came upon the topic of lists. It sparked a ridiculous idea in my head to blog lists. Though I'm sure millions of people all over the world have blogged lists, I would still like to partake in this list-creating experience in 2010, and see where it leads me in the world of writing.
Without further delay, my first list of 2010: New Year's Resolutions List
1. Exercise 30 minutes a day no matter how busy I get. (Exceptions on sick days)
2. Read the Bible in a year.
-I'm not following a Bible-reading track, but I still feel I will finish the Bible this year because I plan on reading it every day.
3. Look to GOD as the source of my strength, wisdom, salvation, love, and encouragement. (A list within a list...I likey...)
4. Cut down on caffeine intake.
5. Sleep 8 hours a day.
6. Blog once a week.
7. Spend time outside, basking in God's creation for at least 15 minutes a week.
8. Cook once a week.
9. Work more on evangelizing to my non-Christian friends.
10. Pray more frequently and earnestly for God to sustain all areas of my life, relationships, studies, family, and future.
So a New Year's Resolution list isn't what one would prefer to call "creative", but I definitely think this list is necessary to a certain degree.
Happy New Year!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Post the Twenty-Fourth
Christmas Carol - Paul Lawrence Dunbar (1872-1906)
Ring out, ye bells!
All Nature swells
With gladness at the wondrous story,
The world was lorn,
But Christ is born
To change our sadness into glory.
Sing, earthlings, sing!
To-night a King
Hath come from heaven's high throne to bless us.
The outstretched hand
O'er all the land
Is raised in pity to caress us.
Come at his call;
Be joyful all;
Away with mourning and With sadness!
The heavenly choir
With holy fire
Their voices raise in songs of gladness.
The darkness breaks,
And Dawn awakes,
Her cheeks suffused with youthful blushes.
The rocks and stones
In holy tones
Are singing sweeter than the thrushes.
Then why should we
In silence be,
When Nature lends her voice to praises;
When heaven and earth
Proclaim the truth
Of Him for whom that lone star blazes?
No, be not still,
But with a will
Strike all your harps and set them ringing;
On hill and heath
Let every breath
Throw all its power into singing!
Ring out, ye bells!
All Nature swells
With gladness at the wondrous story,
The world was lorn,
But Christ is born
To change our sadness into glory.
Sing, earthlings, sing!
To-night a King
Hath come from heaven's high throne to bless us.
The outstretched hand
O'er all the land
Is raised in pity to caress us.
Come at his call;
Be joyful all;
Away with mourning and With sadness!
The heavenly choir
With holy fire
Their voices raise in songs of gladness.
The darkness breaks,
And Dawn awakes,
Her cheeks suffused with youthful blushes.
The rocks and stones
In holy tones
Are singing sweeter than the thrushes.
Then why should we
In silence be,
When Nature lends her voice to praises;
When heaven and earth
Proclaim the truth
Of Him for whom that lone star blazes?
No, be not still,
But with a will
Strike all your harps and set them ringing;
On hill and heath
Let every breath
Throw all its power into singing!
Post the Twenty-Third
My Secular Winter Break To-Do List
1. Get over my ex-boyfriend.
2. Finish my physics and cell bio papers (sigh)
3. Make my own peppermint bark
4. Have a bitchin', jolly ol' time.
5. Finish my LSU assignments
6. Start MCAT prep.
7. Start volunteering at Whittier Medical.
8. Celebrate Amy's 21st birthday in La Jolla, CA.
9. Watch Avatar: 3-D
10. Get over my santaclaustrophobia: fear of too many santa clauses.
I Heard The Bells on Christmas Day
Henry W. Longfellow, 1864.
I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
And in despair I bowed my head
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”
Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.”
1. Get over my ex-boyfriend.
2. Finish my physics and cell bio papers (sigh)
3. Make my own peppermint bark
4. Have a bitchin', jolly ol' time.
5. Finish my LSU assignments
6. Start MCAT prep.
7. Start volunteering at Whittier Medical.
8. Celebrate Amy's 21st birthday in La Jolla, CA.
9. Watch Avatar: 3-D
10. Get over my santaclaustrophobia: fear of too many santa clauses.
I Heard The Bells on Christmas Day
Henry W. Longfellow, 1864.
I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men.
And in despair I bowed my head
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”
Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.”
Post the Twenty-Second
1 Grande Christmas Blend
1 Grande Pumpkin Spice Latte
1 Paper-grading Father
1 Macbook
I'm at the Silverlake Library, enjoying a piping hot cup of coffee. Why am I here?
I came to write my cell biology paper that was due a week ago...but I haven't started writing it yet because I realized that there is something SO nice about being at a library without needing to do work. I know that's totally contradictory because I actually came here to do work. However, as long as I sit here NOT doing my work, I am enjoying the library without having to do work. Peace on earth.
So anyway, here's a Christmas poem I found by Emily Dickinson in the library just now.
The Savior Must Have Been A Docile Gentleman
Emily Dickinson (1830-1886)
The Savior must have been
A docile Gentleman—
To come so far so cold a Day
For little Fellowmen—
The Road to Bethlehem
Since He and I were Boys
Was leveled, but for that 'twould be
A rugged Billion Miles—
1 Grande Pumpkin Spice Latte
1 Paper-grading Father
1 Macbook
I'm at the Silverlake Library, enjoying a piping hot cup of coffee. Why am I here?
I came to write my cell biology paper that was due a week ago...but I haven't started writing it yet because I realized that there is something SO nice about being at a library without needing to do work. I know that's totally contradictory because I actually came here to do work. However, as long as I sit here NOT doing my work, I am enjoying the library without having to do work. Peace on earth.
So anyway, here's a Christmas poem I found by Emily Dickinson in the library just now.
The Savior Must Have Been A Docile Gentleman
Emily Dickinson (1830-1886)
The Savior must have been
A docile Gentleman—
To come so far so cold a Day
For little Fellowmen—
The Road to Bethlehem
Since He and I were Boys
Was leveled, but for that 'twould be
A rugged Billion Miles—
Monday, December 21, 2009
Post the Twenty-First
I was REALLY blessed by today's Living Life devotion.
Ironically, I haven't really supported Living Life because I've often dismissed it as a Bible-reading "crutch", with its oversimplified Biblical analyses and its over-drawn applications. You can't forget the cheesier than my dad's 7-cheese macaroni ending prayer called "A Letter to God", either.
STILL YET, something compelled me to click the link that's conveniently provided by the All Nations Church College Group website, ANC College Group Website
The link to the Devotion I'd like to talk about is here, as well.
2 Chronicles 33:10~25
One thing God has really been opening my eyes to is "inner-healing". Now, I'll define what inner healing is according to my father's 200-page dissertation I have here on my desk next to me at this moment:
"A ministry in the power of the Holy Spirit aimed at bringing healing to the whole person" (Kang 5)
Here's the background:
I began harboring deep unforgiveness ever since something of my former boyfriend's past was brought to the light. It's irrelevant to discuss specifics, but the underlying issue is that I existed as a pathetic, hurting, bitter creature for quite some time. I needed release from this judgment I pressed not only on him, but on my family, my friends, my colleagues. I needed healing.
Here's where the Living Life devotion comes in...
"People show mercy only when it is warranted or earned, and even then not every time.
Manasseh was without question one of the most wicked kings of Judah. He corrupted an entire generation so thoroughly that even when he tried to make reforms, people were stuck in their wicked ways (v. 17)."
I learned only briefly about King Manasseh's transformation in my Old Testament Survey class my Freshman year at Biola. He was an evil king that made laws for people to worship God, but he turned from his evil ways, sought forgiveness from God, and GOD HEARD HIM. From that point on, King Manasseh sought to undo evil to make the glory of God known.
What a loving smack in the face by God himself!!!!!! He forgave Manasseh, God can forgive ME. Who am I to play with my cards so that only certain people in my life receive the forgiveness I exhibit only with earned, merited favor? I'm pathetic. God's love is never-ending, boundless, limitless, powerful, redemptive, life-saving, perfect, graceful, captivating, everything we could ever hope for or even imagine...and there I was...
There I was, xhibiting the symptoms of serious ailment, sulking in depression, delighting in other's failures, beaming with bitterness, all because of my own inability to perceive how wide and encapsulating the grace of GOD is to cover ALL.
Well, my point in this post is not to justify Living Life as the "end-all-be-all survivor guide/ the minimum you can do for God to release favor upon you". It's rather to discuss the power of God's word in this book to supplement HIS divine hands working in my life. It started with my dad counseling me last night when I was hanging out in his room. He literally asked God to release all bound emotions, all bound memories, and to return it back. He asked for healing, that I would find complete fulfillment and satisfaction in Christ alone, and that I would be heart-healthy. My dad was asking so easily that I almost thought he didn't HEAR or UNDERSTAND what I was telling him. But I was wrong. My dad was praying because he knew the truth that God listened, and that God heals.
"The LORD spoke to Manasseh and his people, but they paid no attention.
11
So the LORD brought against them the army commanders of the king of Assyria, who took Manasseh prisoner, put a hook in his nose, bound him with bronze shackles and took him to Babylon.
12
In his distress he sought the favor of the LORD his God and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers.
13
And when he prayed to him, the LORD was moved by his entreaty and listened to his plea; so he brought him back to Jerusalem and to his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD is God. "
THE LORD HEARD MANASSEH! He hears me.
I'm tired so I've really got to stop writing soon..but I just want to end this post claiming that I'm encouraged, and that I'm walking with hope that God is healing me every single day, and depending and trusting on God to heal me and release me is the best thing I've done for myself in the past couple days. I can't even explain it.
Goodnight. Sorry if this is all jumbled and doesn't make sense.
Ironically, I haven't really supported Living Life because I've often dismissed it as a Bible-reading "crutch", with its oversimplified Biblical analyses and its over-drawn applications. You can't forget the cheesier than my dad's 7-cheese macaroni ending prayer called "A Letter to God", either.
STILL YET, something compelled me to click the link that's conveniently provided by the All Nations Church College Group website, ANC College Group Website
The link to the Devotion I'd like to talk about is here, as well.
2 Chronicles 33:10~25
One thing God has really been opening my eyes to is "inner-healing". Now, I'll define what inner healing is according to my father's 200-page dissertation I have here on my desk next to me at this moment:
"A ministry in the power of the Holy Spirit aimed at bringing healing to the whole person" (Kang 5)
Here's the background:
I began harboring deep unforgiveness ever since something of my former boyfriend's past was brought to the light. It's irrelevant to discuss specifics, but the underlying issue is that I existed as a pathetic, hurting, bitter creature for quite some time. I needed release from this judgment I pressed not only on him, but on my family, my friends, my colleagues. I needed healing.
Here's where the Living Life devotion comes in...
"People show mercy only when it is warranted or earned, and even then not every time.
Manasseh was without question one of the most wicked kings of Judah. He corrupted an entire generation so thoroughly that even when he tried to make reforms, people were stuck in their wicked ways (v. 17)."
I learned only briefly about King Manasseh's transformation in my Old Testament Survey class my Freshman year at Biola. He was an evil king that made laws for people to worship God, but he turned from his evil ways, sought forgiveness from God, and GOD HEARD HIM. From that point on, King Manasseh sought to undo evil to make the glory of God known.
What a loving smack in the face by God himself!!!!!! He forgave Manasseh, God can forgive ME. Who am I to play with my cards so that only certain people in my life receive the forgiveness I exhibit only with earned, merited favor? I'm pathetic. God's love is never-ending, boundless, limitless, powerful, redemptive, life-saving, perfect, graceful, captivating, everything we could ever hope for or even imagine...and there I was...
There I was, xhibiting the symptoms of serious ailment, sulking in depression, delighting in other's failures, beaming with bitterness, all because of my own inability to perceive how wide and encapsulating the grace of GOD is to cover ALL.
Well, my point in this post is not to justify Living Life as the "end-all-be-all survivor guide/ the minimum you can do for God to release favor upon you". It's rather to discuss the power of God's word in this book to supplement HIS divine hands working in my life. It started with my dad counseling me last night when I was hanging out in his room. He literally asked God to release all bound emotions, all bound memories, and to return it back. He asked for healing, that I would find complete fulfillment and satisfaction in Christ alone, and that I would be heart-healthy. My dad was asking so easily that I almost thought he didn't HEAR or UNDERSTAND what I was telling him. But I was wrong. My dad was praying because he knew the truth that God listened, and that God heals.
"The LORD spoke to Manasseh and his people, but they paid no attention.
11
So the LORD brought against them the army commanders of the king of Assyria, who took Manasseh prisoner, put a hook in his nose, bound him with bronze shackles and took him to Babylon.
12
In his distress he sought the favor of the LORD his God and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers.
13
And when he prayed to him, the LORD was moved by his entreaty and listened to his plea; so he brought him back to Jerusalem and to his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD is God. "
THE LORD HEARD MANASSEH! He hears me.
I'm tired so I've really got to stop writing soon..but I just want to end this post claiming that I'm encouraged, and that I'm walking with hope that God is healing me every single day, and depending and trusting on God to heal me and release me is the best thing I've done for myself in the past couple days. I can't even explain it.
Goodnight. Sorry if this is all jumbled and doesn't make sense.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Post the Twentieth
Due to the unpopular demand by a certain individual, I shall start posting again. Namely, Yohan Yoon.
I'm currently in a state of restful solitude. I have been put here by God. I shall document my journey, or at the least, the beginning of it...in hopes that you will hold me accountable in transcribing the evolution of my heart as God works faithfully in me.
Here we go...
Psalm 51
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you are proved right when you speak
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts [a] ;
you teach [b] me wisdom in the inmost place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.
14 Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
the God who saves me,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 The sacrifices of God are [c] a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.
18 In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;
build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then there will be righteous sacrifices,
whole burnt offerings to delight you;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
Jon Foreman's Winter EP has been playing on repeat. Pathetic enough, this has been made possible only by the sharing of music libraries via Stewart's LAN. Thank goodness for iTunes. Lately, I've been obsessed with "White As Snow". Jon Foreman perfects the embodiment of Christian-inspired "indie" in this song. He nails it. Neverthless, the lyrics are drawn stark from Psalm 51. I did not know this until last night while rummaging through old ANCCG jubo's.
What should easily have been overlooked and tossed in the trash became a neatly cut rectangle glued to my journal page. For those of who you don't know, I invested $20 at the Biola Bookstore in a Moleskine notebook...for the sake of my own sanity. Blogging made me impatient and want to delete everything I'd ever written. Thus, I figured writing in something more concrete made it harder for me to delete...since ripping pages out of a $20 journal is just plain violent and a complete display of disrespect toward the brains of the past who used Moleskines. I digress.
Upon reading this rectangle of words, I shouted, "EUREKA!!!" I thought He'd done it again. The good Lord had spoken to me. I grabbed the nearest book which quite nicely happened to be my Bible, split it open in equal portions, and quickly found myself at Psalm 51. I felt an urgent need to start reading from the beginning, since this rectangle humbly quoted only verses 15-17.
I read the first line and started breaking out into song. Duh.
Is it as plain to you as it was to me last night? God put that song in my heart weeks prior to remind me that it was all in His will for Him to speak to me through this very Psalm today! This whimsical discovery was, at the heart, God clearly speaking to me. How do I know? I've grown a leap in faith.
There's something about faith in God that I've been reminded of...
Faith in God seems to grow when you realize more of God's faithfulness. Think about it. when you start forgetting about God's faithfulness in your life, you start losing faith. There must be SOMETHING about God's faithfulness then that I still believe in Him, that I'm still grasping onto Him, that I haven't been led astray.
Perhaps I can't elaborate on the actual practicality of this Psalm in my current situation...but all I want to say is that. It hit me like a train. God is good. I apologize for leaving a blinking cursor at the end of this post. | <-should appear to blink if you look very closely.
I'm currently in a state of restful solitude. I have been put here by God. I shall document my journey, or at the least, the beginning of it...in hopes that you will hold me accountable in transcribing the evolution of my heart as God works faithfully in me.
Here we go...
Psalm 51
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you are proved right when you speak
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts [a] ;
you teach [b] me wisdom in the inmost place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.
14 Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
the God who saves me,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 The sacrifices of God are [c] a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.
18 In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;
build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then there will be righteous sacrifices,
whole burnt offerings to delight you;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
Jon Foreman's Winter EP has been playing on repeat. Pathetic enough, this has been made possible only by the sharing of music libraries via Stewart's LAN. Thank goodness for iTunes. Lately, I've been obsessed with "White As Snow". Jon Foreman perfects the embodiment of Christian-inspired "indie" in this song. He nails it. Neverthless, the lyrics are drawn stark from Psalm 51. I did not know this until last night while rummaging through old ANCCG jubo's.
What should easily have been overlooked and tossed in the trash became a neatly cut rectangle glued to my journal page. For those of who you don't know, I invested $20 at the Biola Bookstore in a Moleskine notebook...for the sake of my own sanity. Blogging made me impatient and want to delete everything I'd ever written. Thus, I figured writing in something more concrete made it harder for me to delete...since ripping pages out of a $20 journal is just plain violent and a complete display of disrespect toward the brains of the past who used Moleskines. I digress.
Upon reading this rectangle of words, I shouted, "EUREKA!!!" I thought He'd done it again. The good Lord had spoken to me. I grabbed the nearest book which quite nicely happened to be my Bible, split it open in equal portions, and quickly found myself at Psalm 51. I felt an urgent need to start reading from the beginning, since this rectangle humbly quoted only verses 15-17.
I read the first line and started breaking out into song. Duh.
Is it as plain to you as it was to me last night? God put that song in my heart weeks prior to remind me that it was all in His will for Him to speak to me through this very Psalm today! This whimsical discovery was, at the heart, God clearly speaking to me. How do I know? I've grown a leap in faith.
There's something about faith in God that I've been reminded of...
Faith in God seems to grow when you realize more of God's faithfulness. Think about it. when you start forgetting about God's faithfulness in your life, you start losing faith. There must be SOMETHING about God's faithfulness then that I still believe in Him, that I'm still grasping onto Him, that I haven't been led astray.
Perhaps I can't elaborate on the actual practicality of this Psalm in my current situation...but all I want to say is that. It hit me like a train. God is good. I apologize for leaving a blinking cursor at the end of this post. | <-should appear to blink if you look very closely.
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